Tiny Glow

Behold, our Christmas card photos:

Our incomes aren’t currently large enough to support buying gifts for all the family members we would like to acknowledge during the holidays, so last year, my boyfriend and I started the tradition of sending out a holiday card with a current photo in it to many of our relatives. Sometimes I feel bad that I can’t do more, but then this past summer a visit to M’s family in Illinois helped to change that.

We paid a visit to his grandmother, who lives in a little house about an hour and a half away from his mother. She didn’t have an overabundance of knickknacks and decorations in her living room, but those that she did display were almost all photographs. And in a prominent place on an end table was the Christmas card we had sent her last year, with our smiling faces beaming out of it. Looking at that card I realized that sometimes what means the most to our relatives—especially those who are far away most of the year—is a glimpse of our happy faces. And that solidified my resolve to do another Christmas photo card this year as well!

Fortunately, my sister was in town to do the honors, and today I’ve picked up the developed photos and I’m starting work on the cards. It’s a pleasant sort of occupation for a peaceful day. I’m so glad the various holiday meals are over for this long weekend. I did stay on plan yesterday evening, but it was a little stressful. I had to have lots of internal dialogue with myself and make the best choices I could from those available. It was a buffet-style affair, and I ended up eating some raw veggies, lots of hummus and pita, and a baked pear that was simple but very tasty. M and I worked out earlier in the day and will also be hitting the gym today, so my physical activity efforts have been very consistent.

Looking forward to the month ahead, there will be a few more challenges coming up. December 7 is our office holiday luncheon, which will require me to do some planning in advance in order to budget my calories well. December 25 is of course Christmas Day; as I’ve mentioned before, I’ll be treating Christmas dinner and dessert as a “free” meal, but otherwise I’ll be watching my calories. My boyfriend and I will be up North visiting my parents for six days over Christmas, but they know I’m watching my weight and I’m sure they will have some lower-calorie groceries in the kitchen.

The weight-loss process is one that often leads me to doubt myself. I’ve talked here about saving up oodles of cash for a personal training package; but part of me feels like I can do more on my own and I’m not yet at the point where I need a trainer. If I had more money to spare, maybe it would be a non-issue; but as it is, I am trying to slowly save up for things like buying a house a few years from now, and the more money that goes to “non-essentials,” the less I am saving toward that dream. It’s not always an easy call, but when I look into my heart as I have the last few days, I think that I can do some strength-training on my own or possibly in a class for the next little while. A trainer may very well be in my future, especially if I plateau; but for now, it isn’t an “essential.”